The Tunnel at the end of the Light
Well, its now Post Shingles time now. I have come out of that Tunnel of Pain and disorientation and discomfort to the Light again. Its a relief! Time to see again, a time to be able to think clearly again.
What an awful time that was. Since that early morning in my Unit, when the pain started to make its grand entrance, to today when I now feel normal again. (whatever normal is).
I can look back on what happened and progressed, and see how something so intense yet unseen to the naked eye can be a life changing event, more personally than general.
The issue of walking, sleeping, eating, thinking, and talking was huge. I was challenged in all these areas.
To walk a few short steps, painful.
To sleep a few hours, impossible.
To eat a simple meal, unable to.
To think anytime, unclear.
To talk to anyone, muddled.
Confusion, Depression, and a dislike for Living seemed very real at that time.
I was on strong medication, which, now I can see, had dreadful side effects. A couple of these effects continue today.
Burning, crawling skin sensations that sent me wild, blurred vision, squealing ears, no taste, felt cranky, tiredness big time. muddled thinking. These were a few of the lovely symptoms of the Medication.
But...If it was a decision whether it was the Shingles with its intense murdering pain, or the side effects from strong medications..
Medication Won big time!!
To KILL pain was the Number ONE issue here. Without the pain I could deal with all the other side effects easily.
One of the lingering effects from all of this is Fatigue. I seem to fade every few hours, and need to rest. I will feel fine, then..zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.. so sleepy and dopey. A few mins snooze seems to return me to normal again.
One of the bigger issues now from all of this is Tolerance.
My Tolerance to whinging people with complaints so mediocre that it almost seems laughable that they have wasted so much energy on basically nothing at all.
Maybe I will move on from this Tolerance phase, but at this very moment, whinging people seem to drive me crazy, and I have no time for them.
Who Knows!!??
Stay Tuned!
ps..Real people with real complaints are ok. I do have Tolerance with them! There is a difference.
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